Obsmama's Rec of the Week: 9/27-10/3

September 30, 2010

The Dick in Me by FL95
Rating: M
Genre: Humor/Romance
Characters: Edward/Bella

Summary: A continuation of "Edward Cullen, Dick for Hire" - What happens when the love of your life becomes your partner in crime solving? Will Cullen & Swan survive their latest case, or better yet, working with each other?

So it’s no secret that the prequel to this story Edward Cullen, Dick for Hire is a fav of mine, so when I saw that there was a sequel, I was ecstatic! This story is an exploration of the relationship that was established in Dick for Hire, between Swan and Cullen, living together, running a business together and balancing family together. The prologue sets the tone for where this relationship has evolved in the readers’ absence.

"Y…" she started, confused at my reaction, I'm guessing. "You don't like it?"

Was she fucking kidding me?

"Swan," I stopped myself, trying to come up with a polite way of putting that shit.
Too late for that, my friend.

"This shit is…fucking…"



Fucking foo foo like a motherfucker?

She arched an eyebrow and I mentally scolded Eddy Jr. for even considering that shit while I was in the middle of trying to be sensitive and shit.

"Not me."

Edward is trying so hard to find a balance between the personal and professional relationship that he and Bella have, but it is not an easy thing to do when the case of a missing airline heiress is dropped into their lap. They have been hired by the father of the missing girl, Eleazer Mendez, and have a distinct feeling it’s connected to one shady businessman Aro Volturi, whom Edward is much too familiar with. As the investigation starts they encounter everything and anything from a mysterious blond who knows more that she is letting on, to a shocking car bombing that will leave our Private Dick reeling.

Then I saw what exploded.

"Mother of…"

"Oh, man…Eddy…" Emmett said and shit if he didn't actually sound a little tiny goddamn sympa-fucking-thetic.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me.

Our favorite characters from the first installment are present and accounted for from Pup to Seth, and of course, Jazz! What is different and has me captivated about the evolution of Edward and Bella’s relationship is the dynamics of change and what each is beginning to picture for their future together. The characters are funny and insightful, and the plot is well thought out and keeps you on your toes. The humor alone is enough to draw you in and a love for the characters is what keeps you spellbound.

We pulled up to the speaker to place our orders and once I was done with mine, Swan was once again, staring at me with disbelief in what I'd just told the guy I wanted.

"Well," I said to her, nodding my head at the speaker. "Tell the man what you want."

Her mouth was doing this twisty turny thing and I just chuckled at her ass while she looked for something….anything on the menu that she could order without sounding like a complete perv.

It was priceless.

'Cause this was gonna be good, ladies and gentlemen.

She finally made her mind up and mumbled into the speaker, trying not to let anyone around us hear her, 'causing the faceless wonder on the other side to ask, "Could you speak up, ma'am? I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you."


That shit's funny.

I was shoulder bobbin' at her predicament and Swan wacked me in the shoulder.

My bad one.

"Ow, fuck," I said, rubbing it out as she leaned in closer to the mic so the teeny bopper could hear her better.

"I'll have a…" she hesitated and I had to cover my fucking mouth to stop from laughin' again.

I mean, shit…I still laughed, I just didn't want her to see me laugh, that's all.

"Deluxe Dick, please….number three, no pickles."

Dying, my friends. I was completely…and utterly fucking dying.

"Can you repeat that?" the kid on the speaker ask

This story has had me laughing so hard that I have tears, while biting my nails and yelling at the screen. It’s a fic that I drop any and everything to stop and read when it updates. It is 8 chapters in and we are just getting started folks. Please, go and read and in the words of one Edward “The Dick” Cullen. En-motherfucking-joy.


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