To Be Stabbed in the Front by forevergold
Review by Dragonfly336
Rating: M
Genre: Friendship/Drama
Characters: Bella
Summary: A friend should be a master at guessing and keeping still." - Friedrich Nietzsche. It's all a facade: a girl searching,a stranger who doesn't know what she wants and a boy who is just trying to get out. In Forks, none of this seems possible. AH.
To Be Stabbed in the Front takes place in high school during Bella’s senior year and it’s told entirely in her point of view. It starts out with Bella in class one day, thinking of the joys of high school life and pondering the social hierarchy, which at the top if the “golden couple” Edward and Rosalie. Unfortunately for Bella she has a major crush on Edward and thinks that Rosalie is unworthy of him. Not because she isn’t rich and beautiful, but because she is of average intellect and apparently a stuck up snob. She muses about how they are always all over each other in class and glances around the room when she realizes that there is “trouble in paradise.” As Edward leaves class that day, alone, Bella starts to see Rosalie in a different light.
She was looking at me. Like the world had just suddenly come crashing down around her. Like all that crap people spew about true love and soul mates was just proven completely untrue, with facts and evidence to back it up. Like life was just too painful to bear.
I panicked. For in that moment, she looked real. Like a human being. I hurt for her. So, I turned and left the classroom. Leaving behind a girl holding a broken heart in her hands, trying desperately to put it back together.
She tries to forget Rosalie but is having a hard time since now she sees her as a living being with feelings, instead of some Barbie doll. We see the drama of the relationship unfold through Bella’s perspective and it is so interesting to see the layers peel away. In one chapter, we get to see snippets of the drama through the lens of her camera, as she quickly tries to finish a photo assignment. She notices that day how quickly Rosalie has deteriorated and that Edward is a far cry from his usual confident self.
It’s when Bella has decided that she has had enough of her boring, lonely existence that things really start to get interesting. She decides to go to an all-night donut shop and happens to run into Edward there. They spend the whole night talking about life in general and Bella is on cloud nine. When the sun is coming up and they leave the restaurant, he apologizes and says that he didn’t get her name.
You know in the movies, when some asshat delivers that line, that one fucking line, that throws everything off-balance, and you hear that weird, ripping sound of a record being all fucked up?
I swear to effin' God that was the noise that was now reverberating off the walls of my brain. I almost wanted to ask loverboy over there if he had heard it as well.
Maybe this was something he just did. You know, like not recognize people he saved or charm random strangers to get in their pants
There are so many layers to this story, that it would be impossible to say more, without giving the story away. Forevergold’s writing style is beautiful. You’ll find yourself questioning philosophy and values. It really gets you thinking and that is only one thing I love about this story.
If only the cool kids weren't so goddamn entertaining to watch. I could actually focus on my own life. And not for the first time today, I thought of Edward. And Rosalie. And hated myself for wishing she really was a bitch instead of some human being with feelings. Because hell, that just made me feel disgusted, dirty. We preach about judging people, about stereotyping and assuming and yeah, we all fucking agree that it's wrong, but do we ever really stop doing it?
No.
How could we? It's in our nature.
Fuck.
It's so easy to put yourself on a pedestal, mocking the sinners and sneering at the saints. Thinking somehow, you're in your own category of human. That you're not included in this joke of a world that uses categorization to organize chaos. But, then you realize. You are just as vile and condemnatory as the rest of them. And that is the fucking scariest moment of your life because then…
Who the hell are you?
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